Matthew Zellman only exists insofar as he is co-founder, co-writer, co-mastermind, and most handsome member of Think Pound. Like Batman, Superman, and American Apparel owner Dov Charney, his secret identity must be protected at all costs so that he may continue his vital work unencumbered by public opinion and the authorities. He is very friendly, can grow facial hair quickly, loves to sign autographs, and favors the serial comma when writing lists of three or more items.

Matthew Zellman
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