It doesn't get much holier than St. Patrick's Day. Like religious clockwork, every March, people gather in celebration, observing the holiday through various diverse customs. Whether you're dying the Chicago River green, enjoying some corned beef, cheering on a parade, or pinching Tim from accounting who didn't remember to wear green, there's no wrong way to celebrate St. Patrick's Day. That said, if you don't have at least one green beer on March 17, you're just being disrespectful. I mean, what are we, heathens? Luckily, we rounded up some St. Patrick's Day-themed comedy from the Rooftop library. Sit back and enjoy these pointers on proper celebration and Irish heritage.